I shall attempt to keep this short as the battery on my iPad has around 15 minutes left and I’ve had 2 hours sleep in the past 40 hours and I need to revise tomorrow so here we go!
I sometimes make videos and put them on the interwebs. They’re not popular. I feel that I need to point these two things out before going any further. The reason for the second point is that I feel that there can be a complacency and even arrogance from gaining a few views. I shall return to this later, but for now, the dilemma:
The internet is a wonderfully liberating place. It’s a place where you can create and display and judge and be judged and improved and praised and celebrated and all the other things that can happen. But at the same time, you have the negative sides of this ie. Trolls and haters. This is funnily enough, never normally more common than in people you know.
Let me explain, when you put things on the internet, you want them to be seen, so you make them as easy to find as possible, and so, if people that know you want to take the piss, they can do so really rather easily.
Just as (as I have experienced recently) if someone wants to know what you’re getting up to online – ie a family member, they can do so easily!
And so, with this liberation, comes a huge amount of restriction, as you feel that you can’t fully express yourself for fear of being judged by those who know you “IRL”. I have no problem with people judging and criticising me online, but when people do it “IRL” it becomes real and it becomes problematic.
Also, if you want to say a little anecdote about someone, you can, sometimes feel constricted against saying it.
Now that the dilemma is out of the way, I can discuss with you, the issue of popularity etc.
Here is a little anecdote for you:
I had a royal wedding tea party yesterday and in the evening we some how got onto the topic of people’s predictions of us from when we were very young.
Miss Philippa was talking about how the doctor predicted her and her brother’s height really rather accurately, and I mentioned that my mum had once gone to a “psychic” type person, when she was pregnant and I was predicted to be famous.
To this, a few people went, “yeah!”.
This is another dilemma. People keep saying this to me and it’s really rather difficult. Of course, it’s lovely of them to say such things, but I find it hard to believe that I will be. The dilemma part is that I may now be disappointed if I’m not famous (though I don’t think that that’ll be the case!).
Anyway, I’ll round this off here as I’m no longer making sense, my iPad is dying and I can’t keep my eyes open.